Job Interview: The John Steel Singers
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“>The John Steel Singers — Rainbow Kraut
The John Steel Singers (Brisbane) make you feel like you ought to be skipping down the middle of a leafy, wide road; on a blistering Summer’s day; with a fruit popsicle jammed in your cheek and a marching band (in formation and with all the jazzy trimmings) following close behind. But that’s just a serving suggestion. We think you’ll enjoy them just as much by simply giving their new EP a run on your ipod and imagining the rest.
Here’s Pete (Vox, Keys, Trombone) copping The Ten Worst Job Interview Questions Ever, according to businesspundit.com.
#10 — What interests you about our company?
I think mainly it’s the fact that there’s only two letters. It’s easy to spell. And that leaves more space on a business card to say how rad I am…UV…just saying it is awesome. Oh, and the letters come together in the alphabet — At least I think they do.
#9 — Have you ever brought a lawsuit against an employer?
No, but looking forward to bringing one against you guys.
#8 — Why did you take the pen from me?
You gave it to me. It was a fountain ball point, silver heavy metal pen, good balance in your hands writes well. Props to you for a great choice in pen.
#7 — Can you work under pressure?
No. I can imagine working under pressure though. A Large sweaty man in a beige suit and a paisley tie, smelling of a long lunch at the local yum cha, leaning over me asking me if I got the memo about attaching cover sheets to all TPS reports.
#6 — If you were a ‘Lost’ character, which one would you be?
I Don’t actually watch it. I Missed the third episode and never caught up. Are there cannibles?
Yes.
I’d be a mystical cannibal…not that I’m a murderer. I hide well in the shadows and I have stealth. There’s a lot of ninja potential in me.
#5 — How do you define sexual harrassment?
Sexual harassment!?
Sexual harassment is when someone complains about inappropriate touching. It’s out of order. Luke (Guitar, Vox) often touches me inappropriately. It starts off playful and then moves to places I’m not comfortable with. He doesn’t respect my feelings.
#4 — What is the airspeed of an unladen swallow?
African or European?
Let’s assume it’s the European model.
European don’t have a top speed but they’re very manoeuvrable, like a helicopter. Maybe 15 nautical miles per hour.
#3 — Do you ever abuse alcohol or drugs?
Absolutely not. I don’t drink, take drugs, have sex or smoke…until I’m married.
So you’re going to take them all up once you’re married?
Once I find the right girl/mail-order bride, it’ll all be on – so I’ve read, in books.
#2 — What is your biggest weakness?
My biggest weakness is that I don’t have any. It’s hard for other people to handle. My level of awesome confuses people.
#1 — Where do you see yourself in five years?
Hopefully I’ll be married. Drinking, smoking, getting some (jail time), at the pinnacle of a Woolies career as a Night-filler — Employee of the Month, and all that.
Do you have any questions for us?
Do you allow music in the office?
I like to work to TV On The Radio and Fleet Foxes. It’d be great if you rotate our new single Rainbow Kraut through the hold music playlist too. I’ve found it gets you in just the right mood to speak to someone in an Indian call centre.
Also, I’ll be needing to take a lot of holidays. How do you feel about extended periods of leave?
Here’s my leave application/tour schedule in advance:
7 Nov 2008 Peninsula Lounge Moorooduc, Victoria
8 Nov 2008 Northcote Social Club Melbourne, Victoria
13 Nov 2008 Sol Bar Coolum, Queensland
14 Nov 2008 The Zoo Brisbane, Queensland
15 Nov 2008 Bon Amici Toowoomba, Queensland
19 Nov 2008 Transit Bar Canberra, Australian Capital Territory
20 Nov 2008 Hopetoun Hotel Sydney, New South Wales
21 Nov 2008 Hopetoun Hotel Sydney, New South Wales
22 Nov 2008 Sculpture in the Woods festival, BELFORD. MAITLAND (NSW)
28 Nov 2008 Jive Adelaide, South Australia
31 Jan 2009 St Jerome’s Laneway Festival Brisbane, Queensland
1 Feb 2009 St Jerome’s Laneway Festival Melbourne, Victoria
6 Feb 2009 St Jerome’s Laneway Festival Perth, Western Australia
7 Feb 2009 St Jerome’s Laneway Festival Adelaide, South Australia
8 Feb 2009 St Jerome’s Laneway Festival Sydney, New South Wales
13 Feb 2009 GOMA Brisbane, Queensland
Thanks for your time Pete. We’ll be in touch.
Grab the new John Steel Singers EP, In Colour.
Available early November from iTunes and good record stores.
1 Comment to Job Interview: The John Steel Singers
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Wow he sure sounds tardy and unorganised.. i’d hire him, we’d get along just fine.